Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Is our education system the best way to education the youth?

Our system of education system is formed as a factory. We are learned that there is only one right way to answer a question and only right way of learning. For example, I worked a factory for two months and in my time I only had to make holes into a metal plate and do that for 8 hours. But what does that do with educations? I felt like a mindless robot just regurgitating ideas and instructions and the truth is that children’s feel like hopeless mindless robots just regurgitating information into paper without using critical thinking.  In our system, as no child life behind, we measure students by grades and test scores. So in the fears of teachers losing their jobs, the teachers only teach about what is going to be on the standardizing test like the ACT and SAT. That took away the privilege of asking questions that the child was curious about. That made a current education into if we repeat what the teachers said then I will pass the test. After years of being in this education, the child creativity slowly and surely fades away. As Propaganda, a spoken word artist, said, “My child is not a widget. And a school should not be an assembly line. Making my daughter’s diploma equivalent to an inspected by 2235 stamp. Dear Bored of Education, there not a scantron on the planet that can measure inspiration.” It made me wonder what happened to teachers teaching children how to live life? What happened to where teaching life lessons is less important than educating kids? Could it be that more kids have ADHD because while all the situations in our minds like life struggles, culture, heritage is more meaningful than being drown by the information they are learning in life?
In this current system philosophy is “there are only two main group of people: academic (smart people) and non-academic. (Non-smart people) In a sense saying people who are made for school and not made for school by making a big division between the two. It sad to think that smart people believe that they are dumb because they don’t want to close their mind to a narrow sense of thinking. The damage of regurgitating information is making creativity disappear. In the sense children start losing hope in their lives and start shutting down focus in their lives and feel like zombies. This connection may be wrong but I feel like the lack to focus that is cause by this system could contribute with the problem of youth of being present, in the moment. The reason is that this system isn’t letting youth to become of who they want to be but rather who the system made them to be. Let me explain, in this current system, the people who are “academic” have more opportunities to do what they want in life and the “non-academic” only hope is to work at warehouse or factory or any job that doesn’t depend in a lot of thinking and usage of the mind. You are probably thinking, “give me an example?” Alright, it will be my honor. In my former high school, Fenton High school, around half of the students fit into the profile of no child left behind or a million children left behind...which ever you want to call it. Which basically ranked the student in what they know and ranked the school on their education “progress.” Well the students who were not in child left behind were offered AP classes and made it big universities. I am happy for them, don’t get me wrong. For the students who were in no child left behind, which was half of the school, basically were passed by to help the school graduation rate and school GPA are now working at labor jobs or fast food. We were never expected or prepared to follow any education after graduating high school.
What is the problem with just regulating information? The truth is that in life we cannot answer every situation like as easy as 1+1=2 but we will need to be able to think of different solutions and interpret solutions. We expect that we need to have the right answer but the truth is that when we go six feet deep we won’t have a letter grade in how we did in life but rather the impact we had in our world. These children won’t have the freedom of thinking outside the box because they aren’t thought to critical thinking. For example, in biblical time when a rabbi (teacher) asked questions. The student critical thought about the question and responded by a question. In a sense that showed that they wanted to dig deeper into the question but now a day teachers are satisfied with single yes or no answers or a short answer without having the student to dig deeper into the question that the teacher is asking. We need to reach a point that would give the freedom to the students to feel confident and do something with their talent and skills.
How do the minority feel about the system of education? We honestly believe and feel like we are left behind. The future we go through education we learn that our history classes and reading is bias in the sense that it shows the European and “white” as the best. I am a sophomore in college and I have never read a book from a Hispanic Author and never learned about my heritage background that sometime make me wonder, “Is my people history good enough to make it in the textbooks or lectures?” Denice Frohman, spoken word artist, said it best, “the quickest way to silent a mouth is to treat it as none has come before.”

The truth about the no child left behind is that it has effected minorities more negatively than positively. The government did “accomplish” their goal of a higher graduation rate but in the consequence of the percentage of students going to college and crushed their dreams. Denice Frohman, spoken word artist used this illustration. She went into auditorium and asked “who has dreams?” eleven students raised their hands barely above their shoulders as if they were sitting in history class unsure of the right answer. One student in the first row named Luciano is waiting for me to tell him what page to turn to. Another student in the eighth roll is trying to decide if this is a trick question. There is no right answer I say but they are too comfortable with the right to remain silent.” The truth is that a lot of students are frustrating so they act out but they only get kicked out of school. All they hear from the teachers and non-facial expression from students is that they are failures. To a point, the student just deal with it and end their dreams to become scientist, police officers, a president but rather conform to what the system set them up to be.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

A Letter to Ladies

Lately, i been lately been having a lot of conversation of how woman should be treated and specifically as a male interact with a female. To start off, It always breaks my heart when guys try to treat you like toys. Be patient, its not worth having your heart broken by a guy that wont be willing to wait for you. We as Guys we need to earn your trust, shelter your purity, honor your modesty, cherish your honesty. If you don't see guys doing that then they aren't worth your time if they aren't putting in the effort. Also, understand that we as guys are going to make alot of stupid mistakes, probably going to forget about a lot of those things and please forgive us for our shortcoming, if it doesn't damage your purity.The truth is you don’t have to be a size zero to be beautiful. You are beautiful the way you are. You don’t have to put on that mask I mean makeup that tries to cover your true beauty. I honestly believe that true beauty comes from the inside and outside. Ladies you're like a diamond. In the sense, all the pressures and hardships that faced in your life like the pains from guys treating you wrong, not being treated right because you are a female, being sexual harasses, seen as weak and all the tears that came down your cheeks, made you become the women that you are right now. When i am imagine God speaking to his daughters, i imagine him saying, "I fearfully and wonderfully made you. I has a plan for you before you were born. I know that this journey is going to be hard and you may try to walk away from me. But I will never leave you. when life is hard, my arms will be overstretch for you and all you have to do is to hold on because I will guide you and I will be your solid rock and fortress that you can always rely on. You are my precious daughter and my princess and you worth dying for. I cant wait to call you my faithful servant so I don’t have to see you suffer any more in this life. When you come back home I will wipe every tear from your eyes."
In the past couple months, while hearing ladies stories of hardships they faced and also their life stories. I stop and think to myself, "i see a living Ruth,ester, Mary and Martha in front me because of how God is working in their lives and seeing the faithfulness to following God's will in their lives."
Please don't allow guys disrespect you. You are beautiful no matter what they say, no words could bring you down. But they do, they break you in the inside and slowly killing you in the inside because those words would give you a false reflection of yourself.


Man promise by Zach Cobos
For all the women of the world today, I'd like to share some words.
And so you know I'm not a fraud I'll say I promise of their worth.
I Promise.
We as males are honored to serve next to you.
You make us better men.
So now we make this vow anew, to bless you until the end.
Of this small poem yes but more than that.
For this time is small and my dream is fat.
My prayers that you'd take more from us.
That we'd be more than "sweet boys that didn't lust."
Wow. Big Deal. That is real but we want to help heal the hurts that you feel.
Which you have received from the men who were fleas and caused that disease.
The thought brings me to my knees.
God please!
Help us to be the release.
For you are worth so much more than the world offers
Or the sins of the fathers who have wounded their daughters
To make you think you must be hotter or fodder a spirit that forces you to believe
you are "not enough," "must be better," or "unworthy in our Father's eyes."
Well those are lies!
That he despises and so I won't hide the truth from you any longer.
So here goes, we're about to rid you of those past woes
So please listen to the words my Father chose to call you by.
You are beautiful.
And you know I'm not just talkin about the clothes you wear
or the style of your hair or the makeup you put on to cover that face so bare
but something so much more sincere.
You know, I could swear that you still fear the things you hear 
from the men who are too scared to love and care for the
perfect and gorgeous woman that God has made you to appear.
You are beautiful.
Believe me, no believe God when I say this is the truest thing you will ever receive.
You are strong!
Man, I could sing that song all day long if it would right the wrongs
that society has shouted at the top of it's deceitful lungs.
You are strong.
Or do you think Mary was weak?
No, God chose that blessed virgin because she leaked the Holy Spirit
from the peak of her head all down to her feet.
That's what you should seek.
You are strong.
Now listen, truly listen to this next message I have to bring.
You are worth everything.
I'll say it again. Ya know what, no, maybe I'll just sing.
You are worth everything.
That means that you deserve, no, you have the right
to invite all of God's light into your life and if any man should fight that
or use his words like a knife well that plight is more sinful
than the darkest of night.
No, our words as men should ignite your hearts, make them bright,
cause your souls to take flight, bring you to heights above the frightened mights
of this world that bite you and cause you strife.
What a sight that would be, right?
Even as a joke those words can poke holes in your soul
and invoke those feelings of being less than whole.
So don't tolerate it, it's already too late.
Stop waiting and start creating a standard for yourself
Write this down, hang it on a lanyard around yourself
Instead of leaving it dusty on the shelf it has been on for so long.
You are worthy to be served.
So don't you swerve from that service which you deserve.
Hide your pride and decided against the idea that you can
provide solely for yourself and don't need anyone else to confide in.
Whoever told ya that one, lied.
You are worthy to be served.
If you do not find a man who uses his own hands to bring about
a greater plan for your life, well, ya might as well be sifting sand.
We as men have learned that in order to earn your love we must
yearn for our Jesus and discern how we can bring about your glory.
We don't need a ring to share in your story.
We are your brothers.
And we love you. Dearly.
We hope you never weary of our servitude
and we pray you never stop calling us to be greater men.
With the end of this message I wish to send I beg that you
never pretend to be anyone other than who you were mean to be.

Amen.

Saturday, February 14, 2015

The Blessing and Curses of Having a Accent

Sometimes i hate that i have a accent when i speak. Where everybody notices that my parents are not "american". Where everybody ask me "where i am from?" i say "Here." What do you mean by here?" I respond , "here in Chicago." Then with a confused look in their face they say, "where are your parents from?" I say, " Mexico and Colombia." This conversation happens daily and sometimes its annoy. When i speak, everybody would be making fun of how i speak, laugh when i cant pronounce all the words right, when i struggle that a concrete English cant contain my creativity. Where sometimes, my tongue is a stubborn dancer. To be honest, I know that my accent is a blessing. It shows me that i am uniquely made because my parents are from another country but also i am specifically created by God. I know that my accent is a stubborn compass pointing to where my family is from.Its beautiful, how a stranger is like family when we have the same accent. Every time i speak it reminds me that i am proud that i am half Mexican and half Colombian. I am proud that Spanish is my mother tongue. In the past, after being fun for having a accent and speaking different. But no more, i am not going to stop sharing my ideas and what i got to say because i don't want to be a prisoner of words unsaid. I don't want to stop sharing words that could encouraging somebody to keep fighting this fight called life. I am not going to stop asking question to dig deeper into somebody life that allows me to step in their lives for a moment.

Friday, February 13, 2015

Speech on Chicago Gang Violence

A lot of students look out the window and look into the city and think that its beautiful. When I end up looking outside…I see a city full of pain, regrets, revenge, envy and injustice. When I talk about Chicago, I don’t talk about the suburbs I mean downtown but instead including the south and the west side. Where the gang violence has destroyed the lives of brothers, sisters, mother and fathers. In a cycle that never seems to end. I am here to inform you of three things: the amount of violence, what is causing the violence and what can we do about it.
Is the violence in chicago bad at all? Let me show you, In 2014, there was 2, 589 shootings in Chicago.  83% of those shootings had gang afflictions. 456 people died from the shootings. The youth in Chicago nicknamed the city Chiraq because there was twice the amount of people killed in the streets then in Iraq in 2012.
Half of you are guy don’t care and half of you guys are asking what is causing the violence.
This problem has been developing when the city took away the projects from low income families. For example, In 2000, the city took away Cabrini green, housed 15,000 people and turned it into high rises. A lot of the gangs were located in this place and destroying these building giving these people section 8 and basically sent them out into the ghettos. The city took away the systems that the gangs had and is making them run wild in the ghettos by killing each other’s. The problem is getting worse when the “new Chicago” plan is closings schools, closing projects, closing homes to turn into more high rises and business  which is forcing families out into the hood. In this environment, where the fathers are the best at playing hide and go seek but never coming out to play in their child life, where finding a positive male figure is harder than to finding  waldo, where any second  a flying bullet could be screaming your name. The youth aren’t really thinking about the future because they are in the survival mindset and only trying to make it through the day without being six feet deep. A lot of the youth explain it by saying “it’s a war out here and we’re fighting to live.”  It is obvious in the genre of Drill music…which started in Chicago and is becoming popular all over the United States. Drill music is mostly about rappers that rap about violence that happened to them or that they are going to cause. Artist like Chief Keef, Lil Mouse, lil reese represent different gangs in the south side of Chicago and the radio stations are putting these songs full of violence and threats all day long. In a way the music industry unconsciously are promoting the violence in Chicago.

To be honest with you, I don’t have all the answers but I do have some ideas how we as Moody students and even more as Christians could make a difference. The violence in Chicago is being muted in the news and overlooked. But why? All people are hearing and thinking about the violence is “its another black or Hispanic boy gone, gang related victim” Michael pledger, a catholic priest that is a big activist against the violence in Chicago, said “If white children were being killed in the numbers of brown or black children then we wouldn’t be here sitting talking about violence” X2 We have to speak out for the oppressed and voiceless by bring awareness. Also be willing to listen to other people stories. Guys when we go into our PCM or talk to any youth we have be a father figure in their lives because you could be the only positive father figure they ever see. Ladies be a positive female leaders shows the girls that someone believe in them and that they do something in their lives. Church, we have to get out of four sided building and step into people lives and live life with them and be willing to share the gospel and being transparent about our struggles. Moody students, lets step out of just being in downtown all the times and invest some our free time in west or south side churches or even one kid that would know that somebody believes in them.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

prayer of Lament

In my Faith and Learning class, in our small group the professor talked to use about prayer of lamenting and it was interesting and people been asking me what i can pray for, here some of the things that i am facing.
Here is my prayer:

Oh heavenly father,
My life should be falling apart in front of your eyes but instead i have peace in the midst of it. My friend, Marco, has been sentenced to seventy years in jail and it been hard and difficult to be without him because he use to be like a brother to me. Honestly, God i miss my brother. I am also having a difficult time trying to adjust to Moody because people are difficult then i am use to. I just bothers me how its people jusdge you because of your background and of your actions. Students judge me because i sometimes act like a little kid but father you know the reason behind it. You know that it is because i miss being able to have a childhood because i grew up way to quickly to the things i have seen.and i know i am suppose to "act" like an adult but i just don't know what to do because there is a pull in my heart between the two. I hate how people judge me for talking to girls. God you know my heart, i am just being friendly and treating them like sister and i am being careful tho with not trying to play with people hearts but i pray that my friends see it that way. It makes me sad to think about my sister because i miss her. I miss my little sister that i would give everything toward. i miss the late night conversation that i just could say random stuff and knowing that she are listening but i know she is trying to sleep. i miss her trying to wrestle me knowing that she ends up in the ground. i am just missing being able to play a part in life. I know i am not the best brother i could be but please i beg father put somebody in her life that watch over and  give her advice. That if ever dates anybody let the guy go after your own heart father and to look up to you for advice and guidance. It has been frustrating for me to being apart from besenville bible church. i miss my familia because the church has been like a family to me. You know they been watching over me and been a part fro the past four eyes with your guidance. It has been breaking my heart seening so many people suffering in this beautiful hurting city. Just hearing stories of kids getting shot dow, people starving, and people just not even caring. It breaks my heart and you seen my tears that has been shed for this. God please keep feeling your heart cause i know this is hurting you seeing people suffering this way because you never meant this to happen int he first place.I am honestly struggling financially and i got no idea what is going to happen but Father you are the provider. I know that You are the Comforter, in scripture it says that the holy spirit is the comforter and i pray that you let the holy spirit work extra time in me and make me feel your heart, your joy and your sadness and your pain. God i know you will gett me through this hard time because i seen you work in my life in amazing way even when it seemed that i hit rock bottom. I know that you God will take care of my sister and i had over the feeling of  protector over to your hands. i want to say thank you for what you are going to do.i want to pray all these things in Jesus name, Amen

Monday, February 9, 2015

obvious is beautiful

In the moments that we say something so obvious...like your hands are cold or your hands are soft....it's a beautiful moment that we got off our phones and finally being present in the moment. In the moment that two lose their selves in the conversation that they step in each other shoes for a couple moments. The joy that comes that somebody finally listens to us and we could be free to talk about the good in bad in life.

It is obvious we only have limited amount time, that we are all ticking and tocking, walking the fine line between days and weeks as if each second speaks of years and each month has years listening to forever. Knowing that for us we got a day that it could end but personally we live life like we can't die. Some people believe that they are too pretty, too dressed up, too busy, too young to die but death is slowing coming closer every second without your consent. It makes me woundering how am I going to use my perious time? Am I going to waste  time just sleeping in while time is passing by? Am I going to waste time on my phone to accomplish nothing at the end of it? Some of us even including myself that we are so blinded by our phones that the world in front of our lives is falling apart and we cant do anything about it because we wasted time? It makes me really think about whats important in life and is my usage of time really point back to it? Us wasting time is obvious to others but we know that we are throwing away precious time that we could spent with love ones and spending time with God.

Sunday, February 8, 2015

February Update Letter


I want to start to say thank you for supporting me for the past couple years and being there every step of the way. I am so thankful for this experience of trying to rise support to go to college because it really showed me how many people are always praying for me and supportive in my walk and actually believe in me that God would do amazing things in my life. The month of January was already an interesting month and a good start for the semester.
Two weeks ago, I had the privilege to be a part of a minority meeting with President Paul Nyquist, the dean of admissions, dean of distant learning, dean of financial aid and three other students to discuss how to bring more minorities into the student body of Moody Bible Institute. The meeting covered the topics of how to recruit minorities, discuss how our experience at Moody was and what we like and what work Moody has to work on, also scholarships for minorities.
I was assigned for Practical Christian Ministry for Moody to work in a 3-hour open gym at Church in West ridge. I have been going there every Friday for the past three weeks and I learned that I am way out of shape to keep on hustling for the ball with inter-city kids. A lot of kids are involved in Gangs and by their flashing gang signs I was able to point out there are around 3 different gangs: Latin kings, cobras and gangster disciples. Can you pray that I would be able to use my testimony to connect with them, build relationships with some of the them and share the gospel to them.
This week I attended my first ever Founder’s week at Moody Bible Institute. We had amazing speakers that talked about Running the Race. All of us had different starting places and run in different paces. A lot of people start the race strong but could take a detour, others stay comfortable in their lives and never took a step of faith. The biggest question is how are you going to finish the race?
There were two main messages that really spoke to me and convicted me. One speaker gave an illustration that I have been thinking about. The illustration that he gave was that while we sin the devil gives us lose rope until it causes the most destruction in our lives and pulls the rope and at that point our lives fall apart. The second speaker talked about lamenting. Overall we (the church) have lost the gift of lamenting through the hard times. A lot of us believe that it’s bad to question what’s going on but our God is bigger than our questions. In Psalm 42 when King David is being mocked by enemies when they ask David “where is your God?” David responded by saying “I don’t know but I will praise Him because I know He is working. (Paraphrased)
Financial Update:
Currently I owe $11,700 in my student loan that I took to come to Moody. I am not worried because God has and will provide for all my needs.  I am applying at a couple places trying to pay back my loan as soon as possible. I am still praying for God to show me if he wants me to work in the warehouse or a summer camp in the summer. Pray for God to show me clearly. If you find it in your heart to donate int his cause then donate to http://www.gofundme.com/j8iu04
Additional prayers:
For God to keep me on working me and teaching about sacrifice by living for Him and not for myself anymore.
To keep on softening my hearts towards my dad and for God to heal the scars that he has made on my heart.
For me to find a job
To help me become that man that God wants me to be instead of what people want me to be.
In the midst of the good and bad times to trust on God and find my peace only through Him

Trusting in God provision
Orlando Blanco

Saturday, February 7, 2015

Gang Violence

Today has a been a rough day because i had a to write a speech about Gang violence in Chicago. It reminded me of the pain that i cause in my mother and my sister and my friends when i was in the gang. I had to pray to God to keep me together because there isnt enough sorrys to go around. it destroys my heart to think about how people that are living in the city are so blind to the pain. i write in my speech A lot of students look out the window and look into the city and think that its beautiful. When end up looking outside…I see a city full of pain, regrets, revenge, envy and unjustice. When I talk about Chicago, I don’t talk about the suburb I mean downtown but including  the south and the west side. Where the gang violence has destroyed the lives of brothers, sisters, mother and fathers." where mothers cry when the children leave their house because that may be the last time she will ever see him. Where tears runs like waves runs down the kids cheeks asking "where is daddy?? Am I good enough to have a dad?? where there is no need for best friends cause they could be gone in any second by a bullet. Where the kids are looking up and telling God that i have been living for too long and please take me out of my misery? In this environment, where the fathers are the best at playing hide and go seek but never coming out to play in their child life, where finding a positive male figure is harder to find waldo, where any second  a flying bullet could be scaring your name. The youth aren’t really thinking about the future because they are in the survival mindset and only trying to make it through the day without being six feet deep. A lot of the youth explain it by saying “it’s a war out here and we’re fighting to live.”  
To be honest with you, I don’t have all the answers but I do have some ideas how we as Moody students and even more as Christians could make a difference. The violence in Chicago is being mutted in the news and overlooked. But why? All people are hearing and thinking about the violence is “its another black boy gone, gang related” Michael Pledger, a catholic priest that is a big activist against the violence in Chicago, said “If white children were being killed in the numbers of brown or black children then we wouldn't be here sitting talking about violence” We have to speak out for the oppressed and voiceless by bring awareness. Also be willing to listen to other people stories. Guys when we talk to any youth we have be a father figure in their lives because you could be the only positive father figure they ever see. Ladies be a positive female leaders shows the girls that someone believe in them and that they do something in their lives. Church, we have to get out of four sided building and set into people lives and live life with them and be willing to share the gospel and being transparent about our struggles. Students, lets step out of just being in downtown all the times and invest some our free time in west or south side churches or even one kid that would know that somebody believes in them.
Lets make a difference in Chicago and Lets pray for God to have a revival in this beautiful hurting city.

Friday, February 6, 2015

We Will Never Know When Our Day Could be our Last

Before I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior I was involved with the Latin Kings, a powerful Hispanic gang, for 3 and ½ years in the west side of Chicago specifically Humboldt Park.  During the second year of being involved in the gang, I learned a valuable lesson that I will carry in my heart till I die. I learned that we just don’t know when we will die. At that time in my life, I thought that I finally found a family that I belong in but it took the sacrifice of my emotions, friends, safety, and sanity. I was in the edge of depression from seeing a lot of friends getting killed from drive by and leaving but never coming back. In a regular August day my Marco and I went to play basketball in a local park that had a playground only 10 feet away from the basketball court. I known my friend since I was in seventh grade. He got me involved in the Latin king when I was in eighth grade. Daily, I was with him playing basketball and hanged out every day and talk about what was going on in our lives. One of the things that we had in common was that we both came from a broken family. Both of our fathers were alcoholics and daily getting drunk. We came from families that never wanted to play a part of our lives because our families didn’t know how to deal with destruction that our fathers caused in our families. He was like a brother to me and stood by my side when hard times and goodtimes came.  While I was shooting around with Marco, I saw a little kid around six or seven with brown hair trying to climb up the slide. He was going up and slipped and went all the way down. He kept doing this for five minutes. I felt bad so I told my friend “Hey Hold up, let me help the kid out. Just shoot around for a little.” He replied, “Sounds good but afterwards let’s go out to eat”. So I ran to the little kid and when he saw me walking to him, a big smile appeared on his face. When I walked up to him I asked him, “Can I help you get up the slide?” and without hesitation he jumped up and said “Yes! Please!” I went to pick him up and right when I put him on the top of the slide, I heard three gunshots. Instantly, I grabbed the kid and put him underneath me to try to use myself as a shield for him.  After the shots ceased, I looked back to the basketball court and I saw my friend laying down. I ran to the basketball court and saw that my friend had been shot three times in the chest and blood was everywhere. I picked up his bloody body in my arms and put my hand over the gunshot wounds in his chest. I was yelling with tears running down my face, “Help, help, please, this can’t be happing, somebody help please, please! God save him!! God please! Stay with me, homie! Somebody is coming to help you! I got you! I can’t keep going on life without you, bro. Stay with me, man!” I kept yelling until my voice was gone from hopelessness and not being able to deal with the pain anymore.  Every second I felt his breathing slowing down while my mind became a hurricane, leaving a path of destruction. My mind was playing a movie of the times he had saved me from being shot or getting stabbed. I was bawling, knowing that I wouldn’t have Marco for the rest of my life. The ambulance came in 10 minutes, which felt like a lifetime, and they pronounced him dead on site. In the ambulance, with his lifeless body next to me the only thing that I was thinking about was getting revenge. I was angry at the heartless person that took the only brother I had from me. This event has pushed me over the edge of depression and I struggled for depression for the next two and a half years. We just don’t know if this is our last day, last hour, last minute or last second. I learned the hard way that it only takes one second for somebody’s life to be taken.